Julie Miller's Mental Health Blog

“U” is for….

Posted on: July 29, 2010

What?  Another letter for which there is no diagnosis in the DSM-IV-TR?

You’d think we could come up with something.  Good heavens – what about these:

Umbrella Abuse (the compulsive opening of an umbrella inside; when I was a kid, if they told me not to do it, I had to do it, right?  Come on, how many of you have done it…?)

Unglued Disorder (actually, this one probably goes under another name, like “psychotic disorder NOS,” etc.)

UFO Phobia (aka “alienaphobia”; speaks for itself)

Unemployed syndrome (aka, “recession syndrome”)

Unibrow Disorder (again, speaks for itself)

Unique Personality Disorder (aka “Special and Different Personality”)

UPC Disorder (compulsive need to decipher the UPC barcodes on packages of Oreos, cell phones, pretty much anything…)

Utopic Personality Disorder (aka Pollyana Syndrome)

Ullagone Syndrome (compulsive funeral lamentation)

Ultion Disorder (obsession with revenge or vengeance)

Ultraism Syndrome (aka, stubborn holding of extreme opinions on a subject)

Umbilical Disorder (inability to separate from mother)

Unbosoming Abuse (to abuse those around by pouring out or freely telling anyone available each and every detail of one’s life, regardless of interest on the part of the listener; therapists are automatically exempt from this diagnosis)

Undecennial Depressive Disorder (depression that happens only every eleven years)

Undinism (psychological obsession with urine and urination; this is real; I did not make this up)

Unlealism (unfaithfulness)

Uranomania (obsession with the idea of divinity, and yes, it’s real; I did not make this up)

So there you go.

P.S.  Most of these are fictitious; do not ask your psychiatrist if you should be diagnosed with these disorders.  Then you would be diagnosed with “Diagnostic Disorder NOS.”

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